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October 3, 2001
King of the Wild Frontier
 
Neighbourly goodness

coonNose.jpgWho said chivalry was dead? Who says we live in a heartless, faceless world where you don't even know your neighbour's name?

Well lemme tell you this, friends, where I come from, peace harmony and the goodness of community comes shining through. This is what I mean...

The other night, there was a rather loud raucous on my street. No doubt racoons having issues. I had forgotten about it until my neighbour sent me this friendly e-mail:

Your car seems ok despite the best efforts of a couple of raccoons tussling in the tree above our cars (I was parked badly in front of you, or at least my car was parked in front of, well you know). Joy and I heard raccoon screaming and whimpering and then while I was walking to the door, Joy witnessed (from the belfry) a raccoon hurtling with gravity (guess which direction) and accompanied by a broken branch (which previously had resisted gravity) towards our cars. A big thump ensued.

I approached gingerly. I jumped in my car (not gingerly), started it (again, not gingerly) and turned it around to highlight the scene. There, prone (hidden by leaves) was a big fat raccoon, lying in front of your car. As I watched, he came to his senses (raccoon senses, while not great do meet the basic criteria) and waddled off. A dog, out walking his master urged the raccoon (a really really big fat one) to motivate himself up the tree pretty damn fast.

In the relative dark, I couldn't see any marks on either car. In the relative light this morning I forgot to look. Typical male. Neither check the car for damage nor ask for directions. You must remind me to tell you the joke about not wanting to be born female. No, you must remind yourself to not remind me. Its off colour.

Ain't neighbours the best? (Though it was rather thoughtless of him not to look in the morning, and what was he doing parked on the street taking up some person;s street-parking place when he's got a driveway? And furthermore, what does he mean he makes off-colour jokes about women? Jeez, neighbours. Can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. Heh heh, oh, that's a good one, heh heh, oh ya... ummm, just kidding, Paul. Good one, eh?)
 
A year ago on Pigdump:
My little mouse must think it queer
To stop without new content near More.

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From October 2, 2001:
A ten pound cat can eat an entire chipmunk with just 3 chomp/gulps. More.

From September 28, 2001:
And here's my big worry... with plaid pants coming back in style, you know we're only one step away from a Shields and Yarnell revival. More.

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