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What ever happened to those big ass cell phones? Remember them? Looked like you were talking into an industrial strength bookend, felt like you were holding a lead brick against your ear? Gone. Toasted. Already part of our past.So where the heck did they go? Maybe they're being used by the young and wired as retro door stops in their "totally 80's" lofts, or perhaps they've been given to people in third world countries to sort of attempt to follow through with that whole trickle-down thingy. Whatever. I suppose the question is... why did these big ass phones have to disappear at all? True, the new mobile Fidos and wireless Mikes are cute as a button, but look at this sexy beach boy dude in the picture above! What's not hot about his big ass phone? You know, size matters and all that crap? But the real reason the world has changed to the smaller, lighter cell phone is because of yet another Bill Gates plan for total world domination. The crack investigative team at Pigdump uncovered a daring and dangerous collection of stock photos owned by the Corbis Corporation, an image hoarding company with not-so-secret links to a certain Gates family of Seattle. Two of their top executives came from Bogle & Gates and Preston Gates & Ellis, both Seattle companies... Oh for God's sake! Who are we kidding? There has been no investigation. And there's clearly been no attempt to come up with real Top Quality Content TM today. The crack team was really just bored and started trolling the web for pictures of those stupid big ass phones, only to come across a goofy collection of Corbis images... and hell, we didn't know how to present the images without at least giving them a purpose. But face it, on Pigdump, the content must be real and we're just shittin' you today (for the record, that's the first time a cuss word has ever been used on Pigdump. Sorry mum.) Anyway, we're cutting the crap and giving you poor Pigdump devotees the option to CLICK HERE and see the stupidest collection of stock photography on the web. Now be forewarned, the photos are really quite alarming... IN THEIR STUPIDITY! We promise you won't be sent to the Corbis site, and we hope the Corbis site doesn't send their lawyers. G'head.
Tomorrow: And what about those other guys?
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