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The Dumb-ass TaxOur health care system is in trouble. The right wing idiots in charge of most of our governments these days don't seem to think looking after the health of free-voting constituents is important.Well, Pigdump has come up with a sure-fire way to inject our ailing medical agencies with big-ass cash. We propose a Dumb-ass Tax. And how does the Dumb-ass Tax work? We're glad you asked:
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Monthly fee for people who insist on taking the snowmobile out onto the lake in April who say "aw honey, the ice is still thick enough. And besides, we only have a six pack with us instead of the usual two-four, eh?" |
$200/month or $1000/month
if rescue workers are ever called in. |
Monthly fee for people who for people who cut the grass in bare feet. |
$80/month or $1500/toe (if surgery is required.) |
Seasonal fee for parents with dumb-ass kids who dare one another to lick metal poles in the dead of winter. |
$750/kid/year |
Seasonal fee for the beer commercial crowd who play tag or any other dumb-ass game at the lake on jet skiis. |
$3150/weekend $200/guest $225/boat |
No doubt the coffers will be filling up soon! If you have any dumb-ass tax suggestions, e-mail us at dumbass@pigdump.com. Thanks and good luck.
Tomorrow: the good, the bad, and the bitchin'.
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